"Happy Happy Merry Merry"

I will not give out a million reasons why I feel funky about the Holidays very recently.  I am going to first tell you the pure non-sugar coated reasons........
Plain and simple life just gets more stressful, we travel to the technical side of the holidays. "Okay gotta make that list...did I send out those cards....oh good God are we going to have enough money to get every little thing the children asked us for??!!!..."

I am declaring war on this behavior!!!!!!!!!

I threw in the towel on birthday gatherings due to consistent heartbreak by people, so why not the Holidays also!?! What keeps me together is truly my children. So these progressed negative anxieties I have for the holidays are now fueled by something out there called "Face--booking".... The place that provides you with more of a reminder that most of your friends and relatives all gather together with each other to celebrate in merriment. Things only are getting more complicated with time & I just want to throw in the holiday towel!! OH of course I will not. I wonder what my dad would have to say if he were still here.
I flashback continuously to childhood & how Christmas literally meant the WORLD to me. All I can remember was the most intense feeling of belonging, acceptance, togetherness & love.... (who am I kidding, I also remember lace cookies, glass candy & LOTS of presents!)
Well once again I listen to holiday music way too early, not because I'm overjoyed, but because if I don't I am afraid I will be found out by my kids..... I don't want them to know these feelings I try so hard to get rid of.

This year I'm going all out with the religious, spiritual & slightly ritualistic side of the holidays. This is the time I do miss all that Catholic hoopla!
.....Oh and bring on the comfort food!!! :)

~Happy Happy Merry Merry Everyone!!  ;)